Woman

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Bobpool
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Woman

Post by Bobpool »

NASA sent a woman and 2 chimps into space,
radio messages were as follows:

NASA to chimp 1:
optimize life support systems and recallibrate radiation monitoring equipment.

NASA to chimp 2:
check trojectory and compensate if required using formula (m2-3n)x(5-m3)






NASA to woman:
hoover capsule.feed chimps. touch fook all! :lol: :lol:
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lindsayhbrown
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Re: Woman

Post by lindsayhbrown »

:lol: :lol:
1986 911 Supersport in Silver (the new red).
2023 Hyundai Tucson in dark grey.
2014 Mazda 2, ZOOM ZOOM, its the wifeys, honest !
Paul Mabley
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Re: Woman

Post by Paul Mabley »

:lol: very good

Good place to hide a couple of sexist jokes I heard on Rick Wakeman's Planet Rock radio show last weekend:

What is the difference between a battery and a woman?

A battery has a positive side!


Why is the woman's area between bra and knickers called a waiste?

Because you could easily fit an extra pair of tits in!
Paul Mabley
Thames Valley Region

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Andrew
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Re: Woman

Post by Andrew »

Nice one guy's and oh how true ..... :lol: :lol:
All the best
Andrew





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LilMsPiggy
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Re: Woman

Post by LilMsPiggy »

Tut! :roll: ........I may be a woman, but at least I can spell!!...Waiste??? :lol: Still funny though!
Therese & Ian
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tr7v8
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Re: Woman

Post by tr7v8 »

:mrgreen: :lol: :mrgreen:
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Graham Waller
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Re: Woman

Post by Graham Waller »

:lol: :lol:
Q: How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None - it should be open by the time she brings it to you.

Q: Why was the woman crossing the road?
A: That's not the point - what's she doing out of the kitchen in the first place???
1982 911 SC, Guards Red
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Bobpool
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Re: Woman

Post by Bobpool »

:lol: :lol:
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Paul Mabley
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Re: Woman

Post by Paul Mabley »

LilMsPiggy wrote:Tut! :roll: ........I may be a woman, but at least I can spell!!...Waiste??? :lol: Still funny though!
play on words :D
Paul Mabley
Thames Valley Region

2013 Panamera Platinum Diesel, White
Sold April 2013 2009 997 C2S Gen2, Arctic Silver
Sold Aug 2010 2002 996 Carrera, Polar Silver
Sold May 2004 2003 Boxster S, Seal Grey
J.J.
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Re: Woman

Post by J.J. »

:laughing6: :laughing5: :laughing8: Great stuff.
944 lux, Eco car. Off the road more than it's on!
Audi 2.0 TDI Good but rather boring..........
944 now sold.
LilMsPiggy
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Re: Woman

Post by LilMsPiggy »

Paul Mabley wrote:
LilMsPiggy wrote:Tut! :roll: ........I may be a woman, but at least I can spell!!...Waiste??? :lol: Still funny though!
play on words :D
Mmmmm.....I believe you, thousands wouldn't! :wink: Love these jokes......keep 'em coming!
Therese & Ian
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EL Gordo
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Re: Woman

Post by EL Gordo »

LilMsPiggy wrote:Tut! :roll: ........I may be a woman, but at least I can spell!!...Waiste??? :lol: Still funny though!
your a woman? on a car site? you sure about that love? wouldnt you be better at home doing some jam making or chutney or something? I dunno patchwork quilts????? :D :D

on an unrelated note:

my mrs was asked what her asshole did when she has an orgasm,

she said, "I dunno he is usually down the pub" :D .
LilMsPiggy
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Re: Woman

Post by LilMsPiggy »

your a woman? on a car site? you sure about that love? wouldnt you be better at home doing some jam making or chutney or something? I dunno patchwork quilts????? :D :D
Sigh..............did all three this morning and an engine rebuild this afternoon.....woman can multi-task you know! :D
Therese & Ian
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Graham Waller
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Re: Woman

Post by Graham Waller »

My Mrs said to me the other day "How come you always have to have the last word?", well darling - cuz I can't get one in anywhere else!
1982 911 SC, Guards Red
2000 Boxster, Arena Red, Savanna Leather interior, 2.5 Tip S GONE
lindsayhbrown
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Re: Woman

Post by lindsayhbrown »

LilMsPiggy wrote:your a woman? on a car site? you sure about that love? wouldnt you be better at home doing some jam making or chutney or something? I dunno patchwork quilts????? :D :D
Sigh..............did all three this morning and an engine rebuild this afternoon.....woman can multi-task you know! :D
:love4:
1986 911 Supersport in Silver (the new red).
2023 Hyundai Tucson in dark grey.
2014 Mazda 2, ZOOM ZOOM, its the wifeys, honest !
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