MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

[brian2.5]

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

(Apologies to our girls here!!!!)

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.After months of careful research, "MALE & FEMALE" procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.'*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.*******************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in cheque register and place receipt in back of chequebook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
Har-dee-har-har!

[Graham Waller]

Not at all true however

[LilMsPiggy]

OMG!....I hate to admit I can identify with that!....Except for the handbag, never owned a handbag in my life

[Andrew]

I'm saying nothing on this one....................

[ThreeTwo]

I am posting this from ward 8 at Solihull Hospital. I was kept in over night for observations on my head injury.

Anyway – can I please recommend that no one else shows the first post in this thread to their better half saying ‘how true is this’!! You’d have thought that after 23 years of marriage I would have learnt when to keep my big mouth shut or at least when to duck!! I was always told at school I was a slow learner!!