Diets

[EL Gordo]

Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local TESCO’ store
buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout
queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I have little to do,
on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again.
I added that I probably shouldn'’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd
lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most
of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works
is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or
two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well
and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in
queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
I'm now banned from Tesco

[broady_6]

Fantastic, genuinely you or a story found on the web? I enjoy the classic from ross noble,

Ross; "insert partners name here" do we need dog food?
Partner; No Ross, we haven't got a dog!

[Paul Mabley]

[Nick]

[hotblack944]

...and you're in the Night Club.

[Andrew]

Oooopppps something disappeared

[Nick]

Yes, I removed my post.



Nick

[Sean Smallman]

I've always said he is barking mad

[tr7v8]

I've always said he is barking mad

I must admit is answers a lot!

[sam]

I've always said he is barking mad

Not giving Barking a bad name of course! used to live there for a little while, quite liked it

[lindsayhbrown]

Was that el gordo I saw chasing a ball over by the Speedster display earlier today ?

[EL Gordo]

Nope i was in a somerset hat and a boxster!