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Three schoolkids - a Catholic, a Protestant and a Jew, talking about what they do on Christmas Day.

"It's so exciting", says the Protestant, "We get up quite early, open our stockings, then go downstairs, have some breakfast, sit around the tree and gaze at the presents, then open them - all those lovely toys!"

The Catholic says: "It's exactly the same for us! Open the stockings, early breakfast, downstairs to the tree, open the presents - all those wonderful toys!"

And the Jew says: "Well, we get up quite late, have a bite to eat, then pile into the Rolls-Royce and Dad drives us down to his toy factory. We gaze at all the empty shelves, we look at one another, raise our voices and sing:

'What a friend we have in Je-sus...'"